Elon’s “Uranium in Uranus” drop isn’t merch. It’s a zero-CAC funding round. @boringcompany already pulled ~$14M from hats, flamethrowers, and Burnt Hair with no ad budget. Prediction: 25k-50k units in 48 hours. $3M-$7M before anyone ships. Bull case over 3 years: $15M+ if this becomes a quarterly gag-drop machine. Bear case: novelty dies, CPSC kills the glow chemicals. The product is a bathroom joke. The model is the most efficient working-capital strategy on the internet. NFA
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